My Aching Back!

I thought I would write a little blog about my back.  First I want to say thanks for the outpouring of concern for my well being. 

My back trouble started when I was 18 and my brother Stephen got us into a pretty bad car accident totaling the car and initiating my low back trouble.  Ever since then I have had intermittent pain and discomfort that got worse with over exertion. Over the years the pain waxed and waned but for the most part was completely manageable. 

 In the last year it has become manageable most of the time with meds and rest.  My job wrestling with and lifting large dogs has not helped the situation any either.  In the last month my pain has become unbearable.  I am not able to sleep most nights without a handful of medications and working has become a new and exciting experience in pain. It has even affected my mood pretty drastically as chronic pain will do.  

Lately I have had a pain radiating down the back of my right leg whether I stand or sit and it goes from dull and burning to sharp and stabbing.  Change in position does little to help.  So, as it was time for my yearly physical and TB test I thought it was high time I spoke with a doctor about my back pain.  After listening to my story and hearing my symptoms he said it sounds like a herniated disc that has bulged out to pinch a nerve namely my sciatic nerve which is the largest nerve in the body and runs from your low back down the back of your leg to your foot.

The plan is to try to manage it with medications: steroids, an NSAID and some Prilosec to protect my tummy from the combination of these two meds and some crazy person drugs to counteract the hyperactivity that I experience when on steroids.  I think this will be fun.  He also wants me to have some physical therapy as well as continued weight loss.  If these things fail to work then he wants me to have an MRI to identify exactly which disc it is and then possibly an injection of steroids in the disc space.  If that still does not work then he wants me to possibly consider back surgery.  Surgery is a long way off and he wants to avoid that at all costs, he says I am too young to have surgery.

At least now I am more sure of what I have been suspecting all along and have a plan of attack.  Hopefully these things will bring me some relief and I can avoid surgery until I am at least 50.  Thanks again for all of your love and concern.

My Big Ol' Butt!

Okay so over the summer I have managed to gain 8 of the 50 pounds I had lost back.  I am sure this has to do with my stress level and the fact that it is almost impossible to eat healthy on a budget!  And once I start eating stuff that is not good for me I want to eat a bunch of stuff that is not good for me.
Anyway all of that is besides the point.  The point is I feel yucky and it is really hard to get through a semester feeling yucky.  So here is what I am proposing, I make myself accountable to all of my Facebook peeps.  Every week on Sunday morning I will weigh myself and every Sunday I will post how much weight I have lost or gained....that way EVERYONE will know and it will help me to stay on track.  Now, I am not going to post how much I weigh...no self respecting female would do that especially a female that is as fat as I am, but I will post how much I have lost or gained every week.  I am looking forward to meeting this challenge, and you all can do me a favor.  if you don't see my Sunday weigh in post by the time you go to bed on Sunday...let me know about it!  Thanks in advance for all of your help and support you have all been wonderful so far!  Here's to a smaller butt!

It's Been Awhile

Wow I was looking at my Blog for the first time in awhile and realized that I haven’t posted anything since September of last year when Lily was sick.  Not much has gone on since then.  Well, now that is untrue, plenty has gone on I have just observed it from the little hermit hole that is my life.  Lily had to have another foreign body removed from her in January.  We had a blizzard in Texas (which is weird in and of itself) the weekend Lily decided to get really sick.  So I had to drive her in the snow to the hospital.  This time we caught it before there was any major damage and she did great.  She only spent 5 days in the hospital and since then I have fattened her up (she has put on 10 pounds)  I am hoping that she will be full and not eat things that she is not supposed to. The rest of the pack is doing great.

I have finished my “first” year of the RT program and made it through.  I am in the middle of the grueling summer portion of second year.  We attend clinic four days a week, and I work the other three.  Fun times.  I am learning a lot in the hospital and I feel like I am becoming a real tech.  My academic plan has changed yet again.  When I am done with this program I will take the CT classes at TCC and then the registry for CT and then I may take a break.  I want to get certified in MRI but that is another entire year of classes and clinic.  The school that offers it is in Dallas.  So we will see about that.  I am just so tired of school right now.  I have been going since the Fall semester of 08’ and I want some time to myself!  I want my house and car to be clean and I want my yard to be nice.  I want to blog everyday about cool intellectual crap.  I want to spend an entire day on the couch reading and not feel guilty. I want to finish the million undone projects in my house.  I want to spend time with my family here in Texas as well as have time to go to California and visit everyone there.  It is almost done and I cannot wait!

I have a new little niece, Kinley Ann Haskins, born on June 25^th.  She has had a rocky start but is now at home and doing well.  I can’t wait to go see her and am planning a trip to San Francisco to see her in January.

Well I would love for this to be longer but guess what?  My time here is up.  I have to go get ready for school.

House Cleaning Blues.

I can clearly remember the days when my house used to be spotless all the time save for a few dog hairs here and there, and the hairy cat trees that got vacuumed once a month. It wasn't the kind of spotless that some people have, you know those folks that live in a house where you feel like you are in a museum and you can't sit on certain pieces of furniture, mine was the kind of place where you felt comfortable and might even put your feet on the coffee table and wouldn't be afraid to sit on the floor. Those were the days when I thought an un-vacuumed floor meant the house was REALLY dirty.

Then came school, my first semester I stressed about the state of cleanliness constantly and spent every spare moment scrubbing something. I felt so tired and stressed that semester...then I got comfortable in my dirty house. The hairballs in the corners became my friends and "I'll get to that later" became my mantra. When you have a schedule like mine something has to give and in my place the housework was it.

Now on my days off I go to school and or study all day so house work has definitely gone to the way side and the definition of a dirty house has been bent a little to say the least. These days to be considered filthy it must have vomit and or crap on it, those items get cleaned right away but the others can wait. The last time I managed to really clean my house was last Winter break and during that time I had a house guest so the cleaning wasn't nearly as intense as it has been this Winter and the dirt around here can definitely attest to that.

The last week of school as I was studying for my finals I remember taking short breaks and looking around at the mess that is my house and daydreaming about cleaning it. I even had dreams about vacuuming out corners and dusting the tables. My constant companion during my studying on the sofa was the filthy ceiling fan above me in the living room. That fan didn't seem so bad until it got cold enough to have to turn it off and only then did the real filth reveal itself. You see, when you have cats and humans for that matter with long hair the hair gets stuck on the leading edge of the fan as it turns and cools you off. Well you can imagine what one year worth of dirt looks like on the leading edge of a ceiling fan.

My last day of school was two weeks ago, I spent my first day off lazing on the sofa drifting in and out of sleep and watching movies I had saved on my DVR. Day two was more of the same, a trip to the dog park, a nap, some good snacks. Day three I felt rested and so in between TV, Face book and Farm Town I spent a little time picking up things and putting them where they belonged...putting my books away from the last semester, storing away notes and cleaning out my backpack. it felt great to transfer some of my things into an actual purse and not have to carry around the 100pound pack all the time.

Wednesday I actually went out and was social for a couple of hours and had fun having a couple of beers and some good laughs. Thursday morning is when it happened... I was sitting at the computer playing with the facebook and contemplating cleaning the bathroom, when it began, the systematic cleaning of the office. Everything off the desk, all the hairballs vacuumed from under the furniture, shelves dusted, uneeded clutter thrown away, ceiling fan cleaned and before i knew it I had a clean office. Not only does it smell better but it is so nice to relax in a clean space! I didn't want to go any where else in the house because it seemed that much worse. That day I had to go to work at 6pm and so I was finished for the week but now I have some momentum going.

This week I watched movies all day on Monday...I forgot what that was like...it is hard to relax when you feel like you have something to do all the time. It has taken me awhile to get used to the fact that I can lay on the couch for an entire day, not miss anything and not feel guilty. Tuesday I managed to get my bedroom cleaned up. The amount of dust in there was pretty amazing as well. I pulled my bed out from the wall and found many treasures including lip balms and a bunch of hair scrunchies...I wondered where those went...I had been blaming their disappearance on Stan but it seems he only ate about half of those I had originally assumed. I also remembered how much I shed...my hair was everywhere in my room. I got everything cleaned and dusted and I think I slept better in there last night than I have in a while. It is amazing how much better I feel when my house is clean.  Like the air somehow circulates better.

Wednesday and now I am scrubbing the bathroom...I am ashamed at how dirty this room has become! it is the kind of mess my grandmother would see and say "Oh Cassandra!" I have decide that the bathroom would be much easier to clean if I had all of the hair lasered off of my body. My behemoth of a tub is really hard to scrub and I have to turn myself upside down to get to all the corners. It is soaking in a film of comet right now.

I know i am gross.

Will try harder this year to keep up chores.

Thank goodness for hard wood floors.

dog beds, more hair.

I must find a way to make sure I can do some chores while I am in school.



You may be wondering what the hell is going on there at the end well, funny thing, I found this unfinished blog while I was going through and organizing and decided to publish it just like it is.  The first part is done and quite fabulously fantastic so I left it but the end is still in the beginning phases.  I thought I would leave it alone so you could see how this happens, how I put these together.  Most are not done this way, those ones about just regular stuff that don't need all that much creativity or thinking just get typed out, checked for errors and then published.  The rest however, the good stuff, the ones that make you laugh or cry are done in this fashion.  It starts with random thoughts blurted out on the computer screen, kind of like a list.  Then I go through the list and put it in a more orderly fashion, then I write a paragraph about each list item, and then revise,  leave and go do something else, come back revise, revise, revise, sleep for a night, come back revise and then publish it when I am satisfied.  Apparently I slept and then forgot about this one, which is too bad because it looks like I was on a pretty good role...I make myself laugh anyway.  Hope you enjoy it!

Making my Butt Smaller

On January 15^th I started keeping track of everything I eat on a website one of my friends showed me. It is called Livestrong and they have a feature on it called The Daily Plate. On this thing you input your age, height, activity level and how much weight you want to lose per week. It then calculates how many calories you need to achieve this goal. So I started it and have lost 12 pounds! I have been struggling with my weight my whole life and have never found anything so easy to stick to. The magic of it is you can eat whatever you want as long as you stay in your calorie goal. The other night I ate Girl Scout cookies, ice cream and Doritos for dinner. The program doesn't judge it doesn't say "are you supposed to be eating that?" or "that isn't diet food" I am pretty optimistic at this point that I will be able to stick to this program. Another great thing about it is it also keeps track of your fat, fiber and protein consumption among other things. I realized pretty quickly when I started logging that I was eating too much fat (a remnant from the low carb diets I have been trying to stick to for years) and not nearly enough fiber. I have adjusted and seemed to have made some great changes that have helped me not only lose weight but also be healthier. Of course now there are groupies that want to be healthy as well. I have started looking better and so people at work are asking me what I am doing so I explain the site and they are trying it too. It is pretty awesome I have to say. I decided to include some food pictures in this blog for you guys. I love to take pictures of my food and haven't really had an occasion to share them but now seems like a good time. I will also include a link to the website in case any of you want to check it out. Until later bon appétit!
The Site, www.livestrong.com/dailyplate

In-N-Out Double Double Animal Style 690 calories (and worth every one!)

New England Clam Chowder at Horatios in San Leandro Marina Ca. 557 calories.

Sourdough Bread Horatio's 110 calories

I am not even going to guess how many this had...but it was divine!  And so rich. Crab Stuffed Mahi at Horatio's.

Jason's Deli California Club 826 calories

M&M's 240 calories

Shrimp Tacos I made, 660 calories for all three. 

Gummy Bears 130 calories

Lucky for me coffee has almost no calories.

Strawberries covered in Splenda, 45 calories

He He He.

Orange 62 calories.

Homeownership

Some of you may have noticed the picture I posted on Facebook.  Here is the explanation as to what happened.
Several months ago I noticed the linoleum in front of the sink was bowed slightly, fearing that water was leaking under the sink I checked under the cabinets expecting to find water.....there wasn't any so I just chalked it up to the house shifting.  It is an old house, built in 1951, it has a pier and beam foundation and is sitting on North Texas soil so it moves a bunch all the time.
And so it was ignored for a long time.  Then this last month during my cleaning frenzy I noticed that there was a ton of water under the bathroom vanity after I was running water during cleaning.  I called a plumber and when he came to investigate the problem he discovered that the areator on my faucet was clogged with "old pipe junk" and was shooting water out the back of the faucet under the sink.  Apparently this had been going on for some time unbeknownst to me.  Well I guess the water had been leaking through the wall and under the cabinet in the kitchen and then under the floor.  So lucky for me I have a good friend with the handiest husband on the earth.  He came over and after tearing up a bunch of stuff with tools, discovered this mess.

Under the three layers of linoleum was a primordial ooze of water and 60 year old dirt.  SO now my kitchen floor looks like this and will have to stay this way until it is dry.  Lucky me, I get to have my kitchen cabinet and floor torn up until this dries out....probably a month or so and then I get to spend money I have in savings (that I wanted to use to go to Las Vegas next December) on fixing this little problem.  Oh how I love having my own house!

On a good note I am lucky that Jeff is a great guy and is good at helping females in distress.

Web Logging

I thought I would kill some time before going to work on cleaning up the rest of the house and do a web logging.  Today it is cold here in Texas and it is supposed to get even worse the next couple of days.  The weather channel is calling it the Arctic Blast 2010!!!...you all know how dramatic they are!  I wish It could have waited until after I left for California but whatever...it is fine, my feet and hands have been pretty much numb for a month now...so a couple more degrees won't make too much of a difference.
My vacation started for me at 12:15 am on Monday morning and I have been really enjoying it.  I was awakned by the plumber on Monday morning at 8 am so only got to sleep for 4 hours but had plenty of time for a nap.  The plumber says that the problem was the aerator on my faucet... apparently I have a really lame faucet and when the aerator gets clogged up or otherwise unhappy in any way it leaks down the faucet where I can't see it under the sink... I am sure some genius designed it.  At least it is clean now.  I am not really sure what to do about the water that has accumulated under the house because of it but whatever i need to do it will have to wait until I get back.
I have already surfed out where the In-n-Out burger is between my brother's place and the airport..I can't wait and I can taste it already.  I can't wait to have my double double animal style with fries and a strawberry shake.  In fact there will be multiple trips to In-n-Out, the burger place that, one who lives in Texas can only dream of when they are not here.  A co-worker from San Pedro was feverishly trying to devise a plan for me to get one back to Texas, he was completely willing to eat it cold (they are OK that way)....we are still working in it.

I am also looking forward to getting some photos of San Francisco and me and my brother.  If I don't post some photos of my mug soon my mom is going to bust a gasket! Love you mom!  It is always nice to get pictures of yourself when you are looking your best and relaxed.  I will miss my fur kids but I'm not worried about them...they will be in great hands while I am gone.

Well enough babbling on the blogosphere...I have to finish cleaning and packing for my awesome vacation.  I want to say thanks to my brother John and my sister-in-law Joules for making this a possibility.

Thomas, the Human Kid in my Life

So I was made to feel guilty yesterday by one of my co-workers because I have a million photos of my dogs but not any of my super adorable nephew Thomas. So I thought I would post some of his pictures. You see, it is not that I don't take pictures of him I do...I guess I just don't think to post them.

This is an old photo...taken in February 2007, Thomas is 5 years old here...this was a sad time for us as my father had just passed away. My dad passed away on February 9th, two days before Thomas' birthday. We all spent a considerable amount of energy smiling and trying to not to scare him while on the inside our hearts were broken with grief at the loss of my Father. I know Thomas helped me through that...he made undoubtedly realize that time marches on and so does life.

Thomas hard at work on some homework for school I am sure....he is a really smart kid.

Thomas May 09' Showing off his mad skateboarding skills.






Bike riding in March of 09' My brother in law Jade was playing with my new camera and got these shots, I am glad he did, these are great!

Probably wishing he could go back outside and ride his bike again.

I love these Photos of Thomas and his mom. Those blue eyes are really that blue...no touch ups with Photoshop! He is so cute and smart and I love him to death...I will try to be more diligent about posting pics of Thomas as I get them! Until then ENJOY!

2009 The Year in Review

Well we made it through 2009...most of us anyway. The new year has always been a time for reflection and renewal for me. I have been walking around at work all day mulling over in my head what this year has been, where I have been, and where I am going. I thought I might share some of this with you my faithful blog readers.

This year has been a good one overall for me. My biggest accomplishment has been getting through my first year of school and starting my second one..with flying colors I might add. I have mostly A's (a few B's thrown in for good measure) and have managed to maintain a 3.8 GPA. It has been an awesome experience, going back to school. My sister Debra laughs to hear me say that because when we were growing up I hated school so much. She is amazed to hear me say that, not only do I love it, but that I want to continue on to get a masters and a PhD. I guess I figure "what the heck? I am not doing anything anyway". This year has been extremely busy for me and I have now come to enjoy my busyness...it makes the times when I can relax that much more enjoyable. I also know that someday it will be over and I will be a better person for having gone through it.

I had one rough spot with the pets and that was the loss of Violet in October. It was very sad and my house is very quiet now. I did however gain a new one in April and that was Stan Lee. He continues to be a joy and I am so glad I decided to keep him. He makes me laugh on a daily basis with his silly antics. Lily turned 11 in December and I gave a silent thank you for her making it to her 11th birthday. She was diagnosed with cancer in 2008 and wasn't supposed to make it 6 months let alone another year. She remains cancer free and is still running the pack and keeping up with the pups! Suki will turn 10 in February and she continues to be the healthiest dog I own. Her allergies get to her sometimes but generally she does well.

Enough about me and the animal kingdom...lets talk about some exciting things that happened in the world. The biggest news I can think of was the election of the first black man as president of the United States. My heart swelled with pride as I watched Barack Obama give his acceptance speech on Jan 20th and I had tears rolling down my face on and off as I watched him walk to the capital building for his inauguration. I can't help but be optimistic that things will change in this nation and that the new generation of people will be more tolerant than the last and that future generations will be even better. I hope I will be here to see a more peaceful nation and indeed a more tolerant world someday.

Things I learned this year include; not everyone is who they seem to be, most humans are pretty disappointing, keep your friends close and your enemies even closer, no one is perfect but perhaps there is someone perfect for you, ex boyfriends never completely disappear, and you don't need anything as badly as you think you do.

Things that continue to delight me (maybe some new ones too); the smell of clean dog feet, the air after a summer rain, a cold glass of Guiness, the laughter of children, my dogs faces when they are happy, trying a new bottle of wine, hot showers (even better when the window can be open), clean towels, flannel sheets, warm socks, a comfy couch, a great novel, my cats fur on my bare feet, a pile of clean laundry, sunny hot days, dog laughter, making new friends, learning new things, getting A's, writing something great in my blog, taking great photos, the way old things smell, snuggly blankets, hot coffee, iced coffee, diversity, great music and my all time favorite these days is a good nights sleep.

The new year is also a time to make some resolutions. I often start out with many and am pretty happy if I manage to still keep some of them at the end of the year. You see, if you make a whole bunch, then you are not destined to fail completely. Some of mine this year include; making my bed every day, not letting being busy serve as an excuse for a dirty house, actually trying to keep the house cleaner, flossing my teeth everyday instead of every other day and the old standby, trying to eat healthier and take better care of myself. We will see how well I do on these and I will get back to you later on how it goes.

I hope all of you have a great year!

Vacation Time!

So as some of you have heard I am going on vacation to Northern California. I am really excited about it and can't wait to see my brother. I haven't been on a real vacation since he got married....I think that was 3 years ago? Not sure. Either way it was a long time ago. I am a little bummed and very excited at the same time. The bummed part is because I won't be visiting him in Southern California where it is really warm .... I have been freezing here for awhile now and it is pretty much the same temp in Northern California right now. The excited part is that i get to go to San Francisco! I am so excited to see this city as an adult. I promise to take a million pictures and post a blog with them when I get back. So far my vacation from school has been wonderful! I have been able to hang out with most of my friends that I haven't seen in forever and managed to spend a lot of time with my family for the holidays. My house is getting there and almost clean! You know it is bad when it takes this long to get it cleaned up. I can for sure see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have 4 days left next week before I leave for California on the 8th to get it ready for vacation. A friend is staying at my house with Daddy, Stan Lee, the cats and fish. Lily and Suki are going to stay with Lily's BFF Jayme Griffin. They will all be in great hands and I can enjoy myself while I am gone and not worry about any of them. Once I get back I have to go back to work the very next day and when my work weekend is over I have a Monday off and then right back to school and my crazy busy life. Better enjoy it while I can! I hope all of you had a great Holiday.

Wasting Time and Rambling On

So I have been sitting here at the computer for far too long (I won't even mention how long). I have been working on my blog, adding some new gadgets and reading some of the things I have posted.


I can't believe that I have been in school for over a year now and have accomplished so much! It is funny to read some of the things I posted that first semester when I thought I would die of either exhaustion or animal hair ingestion. I thought back to how crazed I was that my house was dirty, the dogs weren't getting walked and that I was sleeping under the laundry piled on my bed (at least it is clean). Now I just walk past that stuff and shake my head. Sometimes I will spend a full minute looking at an enormous hair tumble weed and think about going on a cleaning frenzy but then I remember all of the homework I have, how tired I am, or the episodes of House saved on the DVR and the hair tumble weed doesn't seem all that important. The semesters have definitely become easier as time goes on. I have really learned how to manage my time and how to not care about he mess that is my car, house and sometimes life. School is my number one priority.


Each time I get a paycheck I am reminded of why I must finish. I am so tired of not having the money or time to do things and when I think about it, it seems like an eternity will have passed before I will be embarking on my new life. Until then I dream about taking vacations either with my family or to see my family. I dream about actually spending holidays with loved ones instead of at work(not that i don't enjoy most of the folks at work). I am even jealous of my friends on this blog that have time to update their blog on an almost daily basis. I want to be able to be a blog addict and write everyday. I want to have time to use my fancy camera I bought and post pictures on here for you all to enjoy. I want to lay on my couch for days in a row if I want to. I want clean floors and a bed that isn't covered in laundry. I want to have a normal relationship and possibly have a family of my own.

Don't get me wrong... I think about this stuff a lot but when I am really down and out I think about all of the people that do not have the opportunities I have, that don't have their own house and car let alone the time and fiances to go to school to better themselves. I am thankful as well as disappointed when I get my paycheck that I have a job and people that love me. Like my sister for example. Sometimes I look at her incredible life and I am jealous but mostly I realize how hard she has worked for what she has and that makes me want to work even harder. She is so smart and such a great inspiration. She also helps me when ever she can with money, an understanding ear, and sometimes a delicious meal and great food. My brother also helps out by telling me not to be too down on myself when I call him and tell him I feel bad that I had to have my little sister bail me out again. He tells me that is what family is for.

Anyway thought I would throw in a little rant so I had something to show for all of my time sitting on my butt in front of this computer. I think I hear an episode of House calling me from the other room.

Simpler times…

Tomorrow I will have been on this earth for 37 years and today I can't help but think about the simpler times of the past, times when things weren't so hard. Back in the days when the hardest thing I had to do was get out of bed in the morning or decide what I was going to wear to school, or who my friends were going to be. Mom and Dad drove us everywhere and we could sleep when ever we wanted, although we never did. When little presents were the greatest and we looked forward to every new day. I remember when it seemed like an eternity until my next birthday and Christmas couldn't come soon enough.

Now I have to worry about mortgage payments, car payments, bills, where my next meal or tank of gas will come from and the never ending politics at work. I worry that I will never have a family other than the one I was born with and what that means for me when I get old. I worry about global warming, credit card interest, politics, housework, my dirty car, laundry, where I will be in 10 years and getting A's in all of my classes. I worry that I am not good enough to master life and that I will never be the person I see myself as. I have to watch what I say in the company of other adults, and my behavior is watched and criticized by everyone.

I look at my niece and nephews and see how hard they think life is and I want to shake them and tell them to enjoy it while they can. That it's never going to be this easy again. That someday they will have to make impossible decisions that affect the lives of others. To enjoy the simplicity that is theirs at this time in their lives.

Oh what I wouldn't do for just one day back in that life. When my Father was still here and we were all together, sliding in mud after it rained, eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with out filthy fingers, catching boxes full of snails or bugs and bringing them in the house to the dismay of our mother. Wasting away the days in the swimming pool or playing "horsey" in the yard.

Tomorrow I am closer to 40 than 30 and I am feeling older everyday. I guess all I can do is keep trucking along and grasping at the simple things in life, a great shower, a beautiful day, a new flower in my yard, unexpected rain, clean sheets, cat fur on my feet, the smell of dog feet and knowing I am still alive.

My Own Economic Downturn

I have not been posting any blogs lately because I do not have internet at my house until the end of August. I have been enjoying my own private economic downturn of late and that was the first luxury to go. However, I do need it for school and will be getting it back before school starts. Go figure, now that I have time to write in the blog....there is no internet. I am sure once school starts and the internet is back I won't have any time for the blog again. Sheesh! What a bummer. I hope you guys enjoy what little I am able to post here and there. Hope you are having a great Summer!

Payday.

So I thought I would share with you the NUMBER ONE REASON I am back at school and have decided to change my profession. I got paid today. Most of you are probably saying Yeah!!! Well actually no, usually this is the most depressing day of the month. After I pay all of my bills I usually have about $130 to buy gas and food for two weeks. Now I am not complaining, it is what it is, at least I have a job and a car and my house and food to eat but come on. Because of our “economic downturn” I can’t work over time at work anymore which is what I usually do on my downtime from school to get caught up. No wonder everyone in this country is in debt to their eyeballs! I have to use my CC sometimes just to buy gas or food. Pretty sad. I just can’t wait until I can get a job that pays a decent amount so I can live my current life comfortably. At first I was nervous about doing something new after being a tech for 15 years but now I am embracing the change. I just want to be comfortable and able to go out at least once a month and have some dinner somewhere or a few drinks in the awesome downtown area that I live so close to. Anyway enough of my rant. Lates.

Dropping Biology

So I have had my first defeat in my college life. I had to drop my biology class this semester. My teacher sucks. He doesn't prepare us for tests, mumbles through lecture and hands out objectives for stuff he says is going to be on the test and then adds things to the test that were not on the objective. I have been studying harder for this class than any other. I read everything did all of the objectives he asked me to, and gone to every class lecture. After the fact I looked at ratemyprofessor.com and found out that I am not alone...appartently he has been doing this for years. He had more rewiews that any other teacher at TCC and they were all bad. I am really bummed that I wasted 200$ for this class not to mention that my books cost close to 350$. Good news is thanks to ratemyprofessor.com I now know who to take for this class and will try agian later. I have decided to go on to UTA(University of Texas at Arlington) after I am done with my Radiology technology program and get my bachelors degree. I am also toying with the idea of a masters and possibly a Ph.D...who knows that is a long time from now. Right now I am just trying to get through the program so I can get a better job. I am really dissapointed in myself and even more dissapointed in Dr. Aliaga for being a bad techer and even more dissapointed that a teacher that starts out with 48 students and is now down to 15 or so in his classes is allowed to continue teaching.

Hell Week 2009

So I wanted to share what will hopefully go down as being the worst week of 2009. So last week when I was at school on Monday, I had my first class cancelled so I decided it was a great oppurtunity to go see the advisor for the Radiologic Technology program at the college. I go to her office and sit down and start talking with her about what I need to accomplish before I apply to the program. (Keep in mind that I am thinking that I will be able to start this program in June of this year) And as you may have read in a previous blog this is not the case it is going to take alot longer than I expected. So...whatever, I have to go to more school and get straight A's if I expect to operate a CT or MRI on people. Well after this fabulous news I head off to my Biology lecture and the test I thought we were going to take the next week was on Monday. I didn't study for it at all....I wrote 2 papers and read 3 chapters out of my Psych books. So needless to say I got a D on my test in the class that I really need to get an A in to get into the program that I want.And then the end all be all... my house got broken into on Thursday. A bunch of stuff got stolen including the frozen meat in my freezer, the flat of eggs in my fridge (who does this?) along with my liquor and my beer. But me and the dogs are fine, my insurance will cover all of the stuff. From now on my alarm (yes I have an alarm and no it wasn't on) will be set and Daddy and Lily will be patroling the house. So if someone comes in here agian they will set off my alarm and have 2 big pit bulls in thier face. I have even thought about getting a 12 gauge shotgun. This is Texas afterall. I have asked everyone and they decided this possibly makes me a Texan but definately not a republican.Thanks to all for your love and support so far. I know I can count on everybody to give me support.

School Blues

So I have recently decided to change my academic plan to include getting my RT (Radiation technology). I went to see an advisor for the program on Monday and she tells me that 1. I have to have all of the non RT prerequsites done and 2. I need to have pretty much all A'a in those prerequsites to even be considered for the program they had 233 applicants last year and only 33 got in. I was feeling a little defeated and it made me tired to think about a whole year addtional before I can even apply to the program. But now I have spent the last 4 days feeling tired and depressed. I am trying to pull myself out of my funk.(It is slow going) I am trying to remain positive and formulate a plan of action. Here is what I have left to take before the spring semester next year in addition to all of the classes I have already taken and the classes I am taking this semester. I will have to take Anatomy and Physiology I and II a computer science course, Math 350, Medical terminology, and pathophysiology. So the plan is to take A&P I and medical terminology an the second summer session(I know you are thinking I am crazy to take A&P in a summer session but what chioce do I have really?) And then in the Fall of 09' I will have to take A&P II, computer science, math 350, and pathophysiology. Then I have to wait through a whole semester before I can apply to the program in March of 10'. I am already planning what classes I will need as the core for my BS degree. I guess I will take those in the fall. Anyway just wanted to keep you guys up to date on my school life. I briefly thought about giving up and just doing the RVT thing but I think that's a negative ghost rider.

Career Change

Hello all. As most of you know I have started school agian to get my RVT. I am considering changing that plan. When I first started this endevor I wanted to go to the human side and x-ray humans as a Radiologic Technician. But after much thought I decided that I was put on this earth to care for animals and so I changed the plan to go to Cedar Valley and get my RVT. Well after some more careful thought I think I am back to the RT thing for several reasons. I was wrestling with some big hairy filthy dog the other day and laying on the floor and had a vision of myself doing this 10 years from now and didn't really like it. Which leads me to reason number two that I want to pursue a RT rather then the RVT. I can make alot more money for the same time in shcool as a RT than a RVT. And lets face it while working with animals is an admirable profession and I am really good at it money makes the world go round. Reason number three is that I had some depression going on this holiday season because I didn't see my family at all for the holidays. My nephew Thomas will be 7 in February and I feel like his whole life could pass me by and he will be 16 and hate all of us by the time I can spend time with him. I could have worked less this season but I have to pay bills. Another attractive part about the RT program as opposed to the RVT program is the school for my RT is 15 minutes away from my house and the RVT program is an hour away from my house, not to mention I have kennel duty at school once a week so I will have to clean up after smelly pigs and cows as well as dogs and cats. I think I would much rather spend time in a hospital looking at pieces of equipment that cost more then my house and learnig about the modern marvels of nuclear medicine then scooping out horse stalls and cleaning up dog vomit.Anyway there you have it. I am taking this semester to mull it over and second session summer semester is when I have to start one or the other so I will make a concrete decsion by then. I can always work at the animal hospital as relief or even one or two sundays a month. I am sure Dr. N! will have me. Feel free to let me know what you think about this.

On Being Tired

Honestly I don't know how I am going to do this for 2 and a half more years. I am so tired. Not so much physically tired but mentally and emotionally exhausted. Most of you know my schedule but for those of you who don't let me lay it down for you.

Monday and Wednesday I have school from 12:20 pm until 5:05 pm. Tuesday and Thursday class from 11:00am until 2 pm. I also have to do math homework, write papers for my Comp class, sketches for my art class and make sure all of the slackers in my speech group are doing what they are supposed to. I do this on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday afternoons. My math tests are done in my own time also, and there is one of those every other week in the math lab at school. I generally do those after class on Wednesday…those take about an hour.

Then there's work. That is Thursday from 6pm until 2am and then Friday, Saturday and Sunday I work from 4pm until 2am. This means that there is no day that I can go to sleep before 3 am (generally it is 4 or5) because I have conditioned myself to stay awake to accommodate my work schedule.

Work for me is basically running like a chicken with my head cut off around the hospital for 8 or 10 hours. Most of you are work friends, and if you are, you can just skip down to the next paragraph because I am now going to explain what I do at work. This is non-stop controlled chaos most of the time. As technicians we are responsible for placing IV catheters, taking blood samples, performing X-Rays, obtaining samples from places on a dog or cat that you don't even want to think of, changing bandages, inducing and monitoring anesthesia and surgery, cleaning up after doctors(and everyone who doesn't clean up after themselves), Giving clients updates on their pets (we have 150 cages in the hospital where I work, although we have yet to fill those) cleaning cages, checking in patients (like the triage nurse at the human ER), Hourly treatments which includes walking medicating and checking patients (every hour), I am one of the few that have learned to operate the CT machine so if that needs to be done I am the one who does it. Sometimes I get a break to eat but more often than not I don't. So there you have it I do that 4 times a week (don't get me wrong I love it!).

On top of this back breaking schedule of work and school, I feel responsible for all of the techs at work learning "everything you ever wanted to know about being a Veterinary Technician" …so just for fun in my non-existent free time I do a class at the animal hospital 4 times a month….this lasts for approximately 2-3 hours.

When I get home form work and school the fun is just beginning!! I have the pets to take care of. They all need to be fed twice daily so this happens generally at 2 o'clock in the afternoon and then again when I get home from work at 2:30 am(or really more like 3 or 3:30 by the time I get here) This is fairly cut and dry and I kind of do it on auto pilot. Although I do have to make sure each pet gets the meds they need. Lily gets a handful(literally) of vitamins and several powders twice daily, Suks gets fatty acids(only at night) Daddy gets flax, fatty acids and Vitamin A, and Violet has to have her crazy meds twice daily(bad deal getting that one mixed up and in the wrong bowl). The only cat that has to have something is Jenna J. she gets L-lysine twice daily (she thinks I am poisoning her). Violet has to run on the treadmill once daily for about an hour but that can be done while I am doing homework (she loves it). Somewhere in this schedule chores have to be done, these are the most neglected, so therefore my house has turned into a hell hole. My laundry goes from my body to the basket to the end of my bed and then back on my body (Thank God I work in scrubs). The animals run wild and tear up paper towel rolls that I clean up a couple of days later (they might as well have fun with it.) I think I might drown in pet hair soon. I do manage to run the vacuum around occasionally but not near enough, for those of you that know me you know not having a clean house is killing me. I just walk by it and ignore it. Sometimes I stand and look at it then laugh my butt off. I do manage to shower everyday and sometimes I brush my hair.

Don't get me wrong I love this stuff. I love the pets (all of them) and I made the decision to go to school. I also adore my job which is why I am going to school in the first place…so I can learn new stuff and continue to be one of the best there is. At the beginning of the semester I was so excited and full of energy. I am sure that after my winter break I will recharge and be able to do it all over again but I can't wait to sofa surf on the couch for hours and stare mindlessly at the television, play Tiger Woods golf until my fingers ache and sleep until I feel like getting up. Six more weeks and Winter break starts. What a good idea someone had giving college students such long breaks! Anyway my eyeballs feel like they are slowly working their way out of my head. I also want to give Kudos to all the people who have gone before me and managed to get through this, some of you with kids as well (I have no idea how the hell you pulled that off). You are my inspiration and when I feel like I can't go on I think about you guys and then it's not so hard anymore and I can keep going for one more day. This is dedicated to you guys. May I make it through this to see you all another day.

On the Death of My Daddy

At the end of every life comes death. On February 9th sometime between 10:30pm and midnight my Daddy quietly slipped away from us while he slept. He was 59 years old. He battled 7 years with cirrosis of the liver and finally felt it was OK to go. Hours before he was surrounded by many loving members of his blended family.
This is the first time in my life that I have lost someone so close to me and I don't think I have ever had to deal with anything harder. My dad tried really hard to befriend everyone he ever met. During his memorial service I came in contact with alot of people I had never met, they all had nothing but great things to say about my Daddy. It made me feel good to know that he was loved and admired by so many people.
My Daddy taught me many things throughout my life. Most importantly he taught me to be accepting of everyone no matter who they were or where they came from. He taught me how to love, the value of life, to keep an open mind, to use my head in every situation, that traveling was frustrating but in the end always fun, to forgive, that choice is an inalienable right, that change is hard but almost always is a good thing, that family is not only who you share your DNA with but the people who love you most, that you can be silly and smart at the same time, to appriciate the outdoors and take advantage of nice weather, how to have a hell of a good party, that friends are something to be valued, that it is OK to cry, that sometimes you have to take command over a situation when no one else will, to be proud of my indivdual talents, to live and let live, that freedom is something to be valued and appriciated, that sometimes you have to learn things the hard way, and finally how NOT to manage my finances. (haha Daddy).
He left me with his charminly crooked nose, my strong but gentle hands, his great head of hair, my bad eyesight, my voluptous figure and finally his quick wit and endearing sense of humor and sarcasam.
I regret that he will never see me get married or hold my childeren on his big tummy. I also regret all of the years we were apart because of a stupid disagreement. But I am thankful for the time we did spend together.
I loved my Daddy so much through the good times and the bad times (there were plenty of both). He gave me my life and has influenced me throughout in positve ways. I LOVE YOU DADDY AND I MISS YOU SO MUCH.